No, I don't mean lost in a pasture or stolen in the night, although those are bad things too. I mean passed on from this world, no longer here on the planet. If you like horses enough to spend a bunch of time with them, then chances are, at some point, you might have to deal with losing a horse too. A lot of riders start out with older horses. Some older horses are the best teachers of all.
Here is part of the process that can happen:
Step 1: Make extremely good friends with a horse that you take lessons on or lease or own. Spend countless hours over several years caring for them, feeding them, riding them, admiring their strength and beauty and wisdom.
Step 2: Get the phone call that they colicked severely while you were out of town and had to be put to sleep.
Step 3: Arrive to the barn the next day knowing that there will be no whinnying and nickering as you approach. Your friend is not there. You walk down the barn aisle needing to see the empty stall for yourself to believe that it is true. Today, there’s no buckets to fill, no stall to tidy, no coat and tail to groom, no hooves to pick, no hungry mouth to feed, no idle legs to exercise, no soft nose to breathe on your shoulder, saying, "Hey, hi." The stall is empty and quiet. There is nothing more to do here.
Step 4: Experience many days, if not weeks, of loss and emptiness, sometimes as if someone kicked you in the stomach -- or the heart. Your mind rolls backwards to try to find the memories, the pictures, the mementos of the good times, but you can't think properly. Eventually, the pain will ease up, but nothing replaces the huge whole in your heart. You have lost a horse friend.
So, what can you do? Well, first of all, cherish the horses in your life while they are there. Take that photo, buy that halter or saddle pad you want them to wear, go to that schooling show or trail ride you wanted to try but were a little scared to, spend that extra time grooming or just staring at them. Enjoy them while they are there.
But what to do afterwards? No other horses are exactly the same. You cannot replace a lost horse, or dog, or person. But you can still have other horses in your life. Talk to other people who have lost horses, even if it is hard. Honor the horse you have lost. Maybe frame a nice picture of the horse and keep it near by. Remember or write down all that you learned and went through with this horse and thank the horse for his time. Keep something that belonged to the horse - maybe a horseshoe, a show ribbon, a lock of hair, something from the tack room. Remember that although the horse is gone from this world, part of them is still with you.
Visit other horses when you are ready. Find another horse you can ride. If you are still not ready, then visit the web sites on the Internet for grieving horse owners. Search on Horse Loss Support to get started. This might not have been a horse that you owned, but if you loved them and spent lots of time with them, it is the same thing. A part of them was yours.
How long do horses live? Well, that can vary just like anything else. Horses kept in good conditions with good medical and dental care and regular exercise and no other health issues seem to be living longer and longer. Most seem to live into their mid-20's and many make it to 30 and over. Colic and further complications can often be the final decision-maker about when it's time. No one can predict when it will be time.
by Jennifer Allbright
Here is part of the process that can happen:
Step 1: Make extremely good friends with a horse that you take lessons on or lease or own. Spend countless hours over several years caring for them, feeding them, riding them, admiring their strength and beauty and wisdom.
Step 2: Get the phone call that they colicked severely while you were out of town and had to be put to sleep.
Step 3: Arrive to the barn the next day knowing that there will be no whinnying and nickering as you approach. Your friend is not there. You walk down the barn aisle needing to see the empty stall for yourself to believe that it is true. Today, there’s no buckets to fill, no stall to tidy, no coat and tail to groom, no hooves to pick, no hungry mouth to feed, no idle legs to exercise, no soft nose to breathe on your shoulder, saying, "Hey, hi." The stall is empty and quiet. There is nothing more to do here.
Step 4: Experience many days, if not weeks, of loss and emptiness, sometimes as if someone kicked you in the stomach -- or the heart. Your mind rolls backwards to try to find the memories, the pictures, the mementos of the good times, but you can't think properly. Eventually, the pain will ease up, but nothing replaces the huge whole in your heart. You have lost a horse friend.
So, what can you do? Well, first of all, cherish the horses in your life while they are there. Take that photo, buy that halter or saddle pad you want them to wear, go to that schooling show or trail ride you wanted to try but were a little scared to, spend that extra time grooming or just staring at them. Enjoy them while they are there.
But what to do afterwards? No other horses are exactly the same. You cannot replace a lost horse, or dog, or person. But you can still have other horses in your life. Talk to other people who have lost horses, even if it is hard. Honor the horse you have lost. Maybe frame a nice picture of the horse and keep it near by. Remember or write down all that you learned and went through with this horse and thank the horse for his time. Keep something that belonged to the horse - maybe a horseshoe, a show ribbon, a lock of hair, something from the tack room. Remember that although the horse is gone from this world, part of them is still with you.
Visit other horses when you are ready. Find another horse you can ride. If you are still not ready, then visit the web sites on the Internet for grieving horse owners. Search on Horse Loss Support to get started. This might not have been a horse that you owned, but if you loved them and spent lots of time with them, it is the same thing. A part of them was yours.
How long do horses live? Well, that can vary just like anything else. Horses kept in good conditions with good medical and dental care and regular exercise and no other health issues seem to be living longer and longer. Most seem to live into their mid-20's and many make it to 30 and over. Colic and further complications can often be the final decision-maker about when it's time. No one can predict when it will be time.
by Jennifer Allbright